Christmas Ever After Page 20

  By inviting her here, he’d sacrificed his freedom.

  The best he could do was barter for time, he decided. If they did something together this morning, then maybe he could sneak a few hours to work this afternoon.

  His deadline loomed, but there was little hope in addressing it today.

  Thanks to a hormonal surge, he now had something he’d never had before in this cottage—

  A houseguest.

  This, he thought grimly, was why he’d chosen not to dive into another relationship.

  That and the fact that parts of him still hadn’t healed from the wounds of the last one.

  At first he thought she’d left because the cottage seemed empty, but then he saw her through the kitchen window, sitting on the snowy deck, wrapped in his down jacket. It swamped her, but she didn’t seem to notice. She’d brushed the snow off one of his chairs and was sketching.

  Alec grabbed a spare jacket, stamped on his boots and joined her outside. “What are you doing out here? You’re going to freeze to death.”

  “I’m well wrapped up and I’m only staying a few minutes. It’s so beautiful. Incredibly peaceful. Bitter cold and winter sun. The perfect combination.” She glanced up at the sky. “If we’re going to be snowed in soon, I want to make the most of being outdoors.”

  Normally the thought of being snowed in didn’t bother him. Snow was an excuse to work.

  Knowing that was off the agenda elevated his stress levels.

  “I’ll make us breakfast and then we can talk about what you want to do today.” The sooner they started, the sooner they could finish.

  “I helped myself to breakfast, but I could use more coffee if it’s on offer.”

  “Do you want me to drive you over to Harbor House to see Emily? Up to the Ocean Club?” He knew he was being short with her but he couldn’t help it. “We should make a plan.”

  “Why? Do we have to make a plan? I’m happy just sitting here.”

  He needed a plan.

  He needed to allocate time to work.

  “I’ll make more coffee.”

  Ignoring the question in her eyes, he stomped back inside and made coffee.

  He should never have invited her back.

  He should never—

  There was a blast of cold air as Skylar opened the door and walked back into the kitchen.

  “My fingers are so cold I can’t hold the pencil.” She was laughing as she closed the door and somehow her smile increased his irritation.

  She looked relaxed and happy while all he could think of was the work he wasn’t going to be able to finish.

  “Black or white?” He dragged mugs out of the cupboard and slammed it shut.

  “Black.” Her smile faded. “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing is wrong.” He knew he was being irritable and irrational but he couldn’t help it. He poured the coffee and handed it to her. “There isn’t a lot in the way of entertainment round here, as you can see, so—”

  “I’m going to ask you again, Alec. What’s wrong?” She slid her hands round the mug to warm them. “Did my hair strangle you in the night? Did I leave my wet towel on the floor? Did I sleepwalk? Sometimes I sleepwalk.”

  “No.” He didn’t want to think about the silk of her hair sliding over his skin. The way it felt or the scent of it. “Nothing like that.”

  “Well, something has freaked you out. Did I propose to you in my sleep? Sometimes I talk in my sleep, too.”

  “It’s not you.”

  She glanced around. “Well, unless you’re hiding someone in the attic, I’m the only person here.”

  “You’re my guest. I’m trying to be a good host and find out what you want to do, that’s all.”

  And whenever he looked at her there was only one thing on his mind.

  Even dressed in sweats and layers of wool, she was stunning.

  Her cheeks were pink from the cold and her eyes were a deeper blue than usual. “What would you be doing if I wasn’t here?”

  “That’s irrelevant because you are here.”

  “And I’m sensing that you wish I wasn’t. You’ve changed your mind about this.” She put her coffee down. “That’s fine, Alec. There’s no commitment between us. No promises, just the truth, remember? You’re allowed to change your mind.” She walked to the kitchen door.

  “Where are you going?”

  “To pack my things. I’ll stay with Em for a few days. Not a problem. We can meet up at the Ocean Club for a drink at some point.”

  “No!” A few moments earlier he would have been willing to pay her to do just that, but now he discovered he didn’t want her to. “I don’t want you to leave.”

  “But a moment ago—”

  “I don’t want you to leave.”

  “I don’t understand.”

  He didn’t understand, either. He knew he was behaving like a jerk. “I have a deadline, that’s all. I need to work.”

  “So what are you doing talking to me? Go and work.”

  “I can’t.”

  “Why?” She shook her head, confused. “Writer’s block? Jet lag?”

  “I need to entertain you.”

  Her brows rose. “That’s what this is about? Alec, I’m not a six-year-old on a playdate. You’re not a performing clown and I don’t need anyone to ‘entertain’ me. I can entertain myself. If you need to work, work. I’ll see you when you’re done, whenever that might be.”

  His mouth was dry. It couldn’t be that easy. “I don’t want you to be bored.”

  “Are you kidding me? I’m never bored.” She paused. “This isn’t about me, is it? It’s about your ex-wife. You’re standing there wondering what you’ve done, inviting someone into your space. Well, today’s news flash, Alec, is that I won’t be bored. I don’t need anyone else to occupy me, so you go do whatever it is you need to do and I’ll see you for steaming hot sex later. Or not.”

  If the words hadn’t done it, the look in her eyes would have.

  He was swamped with desire, dizzy with it. “What will you do?”

  He knew what he wanted to do now and it had nothing to do with the books waiting for him upstairs in his study.

  “I don’t know. I might do some work myself—I have a commission from the Ferraras so I’ll need to do some designs. Or I might read, or go for a walk. I haven’t decided yet, but you don’t need to be part of it.” She strolled across the kitchen, rose on tiptoe and kissed his cheek. “You’re grouchy because you think I have a hidden agenda—I don’t. Also because you worked half the night. Drink more coffee.”

  He stared at her. “You knew I was working?”

  “You weren’t in the bed. I was worried my hair might have driven you to sleep in the spare room or something. I came looking for you and saw you in your study, head down.”

  “Why would your hair have driven me to the spare room?”

  She gave a rueful smile and lifted the ends with her fingers. “Because it gets everywhere. That’s the downside of long hair.” She gave a self-conscious shrug. “Richard wanted me to cut it.”

  “I’m starting to think he could have been neurologically impaired. I didn’t know you came to the study. I didn’t hear you.”

  “You were working. I didn’t want to disturb your concentration.” She scooped her hair back from her face. “You’re longing to dive into your work, so go do that and I’ll see you later. Hope the words flow.”

  She’d offered him exactly what he wanted. Space.

  So why did he feel like locking the door with her on the inside?

  SKY WORKED IN the garden room for a few hours, then borrowed Alec’s down jacket, which was warmer than hers, slung her Nikon over her shoulder and went for a walk, reasoning that if she wasn’t in the house he wouldn’t feel the need to entertain her.

  At least now she understood the reason for the change in him.

  She wondered if he realized just how much his response had revealed about his relationship with his ex-wife.

&nbs
p; Clearly Selina had expected to be entertained all the time and for someone like Alec, adventurous, independent and self-reliant, that must have created an almost unmanageable pressure.

  Why did he blame himself for something that was so obviously at best only 50 percent his responsibility?

  As usual she had more questions than answers and she pondered them as she strolled up the road that wound round the west coast of the island and down to the harbor, pausing to take photos on the way.

  It was a perfect winter’s day.

  The roads had been cleared and she followed the main road back into town, knowing that if she took a detour she’d end up in deep snow.

  As she snuggled inside Alec’s jacket and felt the cold numb her cheeks she realized she felt freer than she had in ages. Over the past year visits to the island had been accompanied by a low level of background stress brought on by Richard’s undisguised impatience with her for choosing to spend her time “in the middle of nowhere.” She hadn’t let his views stop her coming but she’d be lying to herself if she pretended his disapproval hadn’t lessened her enjoyment.

  Disapproval.

  He’d tried to control her with disapproval, just as her parents did.

  Why hadn’t she seen that?

  It felt almost decadent to be here alone, with no one to answer to but herself. No one to hurry back to. No one complaining if she didn’t answer her phone within two rings. For once she wasn’t juggling Richard’s needs with her own.

  Was this how Alec had felt in his marriage? Had it been a constant tug-of-war between what Selina needed and what he wanted?

  The cold air cleared her brain and lifted her spirits and by the time she dropped down past the Ocean Club she was smiling.

  She heard the blare of the horn as the ferry left for the mainland and stood for a moment, comparing winter to summer.

  Main Street, bustling with tourists in the summer, was transformed by snow and decorations. Lights twinkled in windows and wreaths of greenery decorated the doors.

  She strolled past Harbor Stores, its windows full of festive food and gift ideas, and on impulse went inside.

  She emerged moments later with a smile on her face and a bag stuffed with essential items.

  Still laughing at her exchange with Mel, who worked the checkout, she paused outside Summer Scoop, the ice cream store. Lisa, the owner, was busy serving coffee and hot chocolate to frozen locals and winter sports enthusiasts.

  Remembering how close Lisa had come to losing the business before Emily had stepped in to help, Sky was pleased to see the place busy.

  The mural Sky herself had painted for the place in the summer had transformed the interior from drab and dull to cheery and bright.

  Lisa passed two hot chocolates topped with whipped cream and chocolate sprinkles across the counter and then noticed Sky and waved.

  Sky waved back and carried on walking until she reached her destination.

  The store had no sign outside, and no decorations in the window.

  Inside she could see Emily dipping a brush into a paint pot. One wall of the empty store was covered in haphazard stripes of paint.

  Sky pushed open the door, relieved to escape from the cold. “Hi, do you know where I could find a new store called Something Seashore?” She put her bag down on the floor, making sure the contents were concealed.

  “Sky!” Lizzy, Emily’s six-year-old niece, shot across the store and Sky scooped her up.

  “How have you been, my little popcorn pal? Is that a new tiara you’re wearing?” She hugged her tightly. “And that’s a great necklace. You made that?”

  “I made it with Rachel last week.”

  “She’s Miss Cooper to you.” Emily put down the paintbrush she was holding. Her hair was caught in a ponytail and she looked harassed. “I hate this part. The decorating. I just want it done.”

  “Decorating is the fun part.”

  “No, the business will be the fun part. Where did you get that jacket? It’s too big for you.”

  “It’s Alec’s. I borrowed it.” Sky set Lizzy down gently. “Need some help?”

  “Do you really need to ask? I’ve painted fifteen stripes on the wall and I don’t like any of them. They all seem wrong.”

  “That’s because they are all wrong.” Sky squinted at the colors. “Grays and creams. You’re playing it safe again, Em.”

  “The merchandise is going to be more important than the wall color.”

  “Agreed, but you want the wall color to set off the merchandise to its best advantage. The place is called Something Seashore not Something Boring. You need this place to feel like a trip to the beach.” Sky slipped off Alec’s jacket and put it over the back of a chair. “Is this all the paint you have?”

  “I have a whole bag of samples. Help yourself.”

  Sky rummaged through the bag. “I thought you were talking to someone about designing the interior.”

  “I couldn’t afford them. Ryan has someone who is going to help me fix the place up, but first I need paint color.”

  “You need to catch me up. I’m out of the loop.”

  “You were busy with your exhibition.”

  Sky felt a stab of guilt. “Well, I’m not busy now.” She set all the blues out in front of her. “Do you have a bowl of some sort?”

  “What for?”

  “I want to mix these paints.”

  “Can’t you just use a ready-mixed one?”

  “No, because none of these are just right.” Sky pushed up the sleeves of her sweater and knotted her hair at the back of her head. “When people walk through that door next summer, they’re going to know they’re at the beach.”

  “Are we going to paint a mural? Like we did with Summer Scoop?” Lizzy bounced with excitement. “Can I help?”

  “I’m relying on it. But first I want to try something.” Sky poured, mixed and experimented until she’d produced the shade she wanted. Then she painted a stripe on the wall next to the others.

  Emily sighed. “For two days I’ve been painting stripes, and you walk in here and in one swipe of the brush you have the perfect color. I’d hate you if I weren’t so grateful. You’re brilliant.”

  “I haven’t finished. We’re going to do a paint effect.”

  “We are?”

  “Yes, because block color is so hard. Something swirling, so that it feels as if we’re under the water.”

  “Drowning? Because that would be appropriate.”

  Skylar smiled. “Not drowning. Think of me as your life preserver.” She experimented and Emily left her to it and started unpacking boxes.

  The afternoon passed quickly as they worked and caught up on the latest gossip.

  “Where’s Alec?”

  “Working.” Sky wiped a damp rag over the paint, smearing it. “Where’s Ryan?”

  “Working at the Ocean Club. The winter crowd is increasing. And Zach has flown Brittany to the mainland. She’s talking to someone at the university. Lizzy, don’t put painty fingers in your hair, honey. Go wash them.”

  Sky watched as Lizzy skipped over to the tiny bathroom at the back of the store. “How is she doing?”

  “She’s good.” Emily mopped up the paint that Lizzy had spattered on the floor. “Better than I could have hoped for. She loves school, but that’s mostly because of Rachel of course. And she and Lisa’s twins are inseparable.”

  “It’s good having two close friends—you always have one spare.” She looked at Emily, noticing how tired she looked. “Is something wrong?”

  “No! Nothing.”

  “Hey, this is me.” Concerned, Sky put the paintbrush down. “Are you finding it hard? These past few months have been like a whirlwind for you and being responsible for a child is a huge thing.” At least for her friend, who hadn’t chosen this life.

  “I’m tired.” Emily picked at a smear of paint on her hand. “And sometimes I’m scared I’m not a good enough mom.”

  “You’re the best.” Sky wrapped h
er friend in a tight hug. “No one could be better than you.”

  “Am I?” Emily’s voice was muffled against her shoulder. “What if I’m doing it wrong?”

  “You’re not doing it wrong. Remember when you brought Lizzy here at the beginning of the summer? She was this pale, silent kid who wouldn’t let go of that bear—Alistair—”

  “Andrew.”

  “That’s him. Andrew. You see? You know the name of the bear and I don’t. She looks well, Em.”

  “She still has Andrew. And six stuffed puffins that Ryan bought her.”

  “Six?”

  “One and five spares.”

  Sky grinned. “That’s adorable.”

  “I lie awake at night wondering how Lizzy came to be living with me.”

  “She’s lucky to be living with you.” Skylar thought about her own parents and the way they’d raised her, and then thought about Alec’s family and the way Suzanne had sat and talked with her. “There is no one way to be a parent. Just be the way that feels right for you.”

  “It’s scary.”

  “Sure, but you’re not on your own with it. You have us. And Ryan.”

  “Yes. Thank goodness for Ryan. So what’s happening with you and Alec?”

  “Nothing is happening.”

  “He was there for you when you were in trouble. That’s pretty powerful, Sky. But I’m worried. I don’t think Alec is capable of happy-ever-after.”

  “I don’t want happy-ever-after with Alec. Relax.”

  “His divorce had a bad effect on him. What if he hurts you?”

  “He isn’t going to hurt me—” She broke off as Lizzy came running back into the room.

  The little girl screeched to a halt when she saw them. “Why are you hugging?”

  “Because that’s what friends do.” Sky released Emily, who stepped back and smoothed her hair.

  Lizzy giggled. “Sky has blue paint in her hair.”

  “Does it look good? Tell me it suits me.” Sky picked up the paintbrush and advanced on Lizzy. “I think you need blue hair, too.”

  With a squeal of delicious panic, Lizzy raced toward the front door and ran slap into Alec.

  “Whoa.” He caught her before she could fall, scooping her up in an easy movement. “What’s the rush?”

  “Sky was going to paint my hair blue!”